I'm Investing in a Leash
by AnimeGirl 144
Summary: After only being on a planet for a short while, Lazer Team is already in hot water [LT Weekly Challenge][2 of 6]


Ten minutes. They were only on the alien planet for ten minutes, and they were already in trouble.

Woody was kidnapped.

They had crash landed on the planet, and after a short time investigating their crash area, they managed to come across some of the locals of the planet. They were humanoid in shape, and had multiple colors to their skin. The locals inspected the four humans curiously, and Woody translated their language to the other three. Everything was going fine and well, with the locals being friendly, when two locals suddenly grabbed Woody by the arms and ran.

The three members tried to give chase, but the locals out ran them. Turned out, they were a lot faster than the boots; who knew? Herman continued as far as he could, but he lost sight of them, and so he turned back to meet up with his other teammates.

* * *

"Dammit," Hagan sighed in aggravation, running a hand through his hair.

"This is your fault kid," Herman accused from his seat on a fallen tree log.

"My fault?! How the hell is this my fault?" Zach demanded.

"Your flirting sent them running," Herman answered.

"Both of you, not now," Hagan cut in, turning and sending the two a glare.

On a normal day, they would have ignored Hagan, but they were under extreme conditions. They were in the middle of who knows where on a planet miles (light years, as Woody constantly corrected them) away from their planet, and their only source of information had been snatched from them.

In short, they were fucked.

"So what are we gonna do?" Herman spoke up, looking at his fellow teammates.

"We're going to get Woody," Hagan replied.

"How though? They went and ran off, and we don't have a way to find them," Zach commented.

"We know they went this way," the ex-sheriff answered, gesturing in the direction they had been running to. "We'll just keep following their path, and hopefully get lucky."

"That sounds stupid," Zach mentioned.

"You have a better idea?" Hagan questioned, turning to glare at Zach. "I'm all ears."

Zach frowned at the challenge in Hagan's voice, but he ultimately conceded and glanced away. Hagan sent a look at Herman, gauging whether or not he was going to question him. Herman didn't fight the decision, and with everyone on board, the three began their journey once more to retrieve their friend.

* * *

Through sheer dumb luck (because considering their group, there was no such thing as a miracle), the three men found where the locals lived. All of them were gathered in what they guessed to be the town's center. They were talking and eating, but there was no sign of Woody anywhere among them.

"You got a plan, Half-Ass?" Herman asked his friend.

"Do we ever need a plan?" Zach questioned.

"They have Woody, so yes, we're going to have a plan. We can't go in shooting at random; you might hit Woody," Hagan explained, glaring at Zach.

"I could just run in there without them seeing," Herman commented.

"They can out run you," Zach pointed out.

"I have the element of surprise," Herman countered.

 _ **Guys?**_

The three men nearly jumped out of their skin by the sudden voice in their heads.

 _ **Woody?!**_ Hagan replied back urgently, eyeing the center once more.

 _ **The hell are you, shithead?**_ Zach questioned, getting elbowed in the ribs by Hagan.

 _ **Why didn't you try this sooner?**_ Herman asked.

 _ **Woody, are you alright? Have they hurt you? Where are you?**_ Hagan asked, still not finding Woody among the crowd.

 _ **I'm fine. The Gulions haven't hurt me. They're mostly curious about us humans,**_ Woody responded.

 _ **So they kidnapped you?**_ Herman questioned.

 _ **They wanted to show me off to their friends.**_

 _ **Woody. Where. Are. You?**_ Hagan demanded, slowly beginning to lose his patience.

 _ **I'm toward the back. I'll let them know you're here, and they should guide you over to where I'm at,**_ Woody replied.

"Jeez. Parental much?" Zach mocked the gauntlet-wearing man.

Hagan sent him a scathing look, but didn't reply because some Gulions stepped up. The three humans tensed up at their approach, but the Gulions offered them kind smiles and guided them through the center. True to his word, Woody was at the back, surrounded by the Gulions they had encountered at their ship. Woody grinned and waved at them, like this was totally normal.

If Hagan wasn't so relieved, he would have strangled the younger man right then and there.

"Hi guys," Woody greeted.

"Really jackass? You go and get yourself nabbed, and the first thing you say to us is 'Hi guys?'" Zach asked.

"Technically, I said, 'Guys' when I communicated with you through the mind link," Woody corrected.

"You're positive they haven't hurt you Woody?" Hagan asked, ignoring the debate him and Zach had.

"Of course. They're simply curious about our species," Woody answered.

"Yeah, I don't think that's what they're curious about," Herman spoke up.

"What do you mean?" Woody asked.

"I'm noticing they're gesturing a whole lot, and it's primarily at their faces," Herman pointed out.

The other members of the team did a quick sweep of the area, and found Herman to be correct. The Gulions were making hand gestures in Woody's direction, and then their own faces. Some were smiling and laughing as they did it, but others were in wonder and amazement. There was silence among the four humans for all of two seconds before Zach broke out into a gut busting laughter.

"It's your nose!" Zach pointed out between laughing. "They're amazed by how large it is."

Herman joined in on the laughter, confusing the Gulions close by. Woody's face had turned red in embarrassment when Zach pointed it out, and he made a strangled noise that sounded like a mix between shame and bewilderment. Hagan felt annoyed because the Gulions had kidnapped Woody and caused Hagan to worry about the young man's state of wellbeing, just so they could observe Woody's _nose?_

 _I hate space travel_ , Hagan thought with a sigh.

* * *

 **I was thinking about writing an angst story centered on the theme, but I opted to try something humorous.**


End file.
